Within a week, as the weather turned south of nothing and Santa Claus came to town, I became a wimp. What can I say, I became customary to the fuzzy warmth of vodka shots and indoor heating. I looked away at the great gusts of wind blowing trees over the streets, people in furry coats scurrying down the pavement and the snow falling wildly, thinking around how pleased I was not to be at the cemetery doing an interval workout. Instead, I began a slow jog on the treadwheel of my bright, cheerful, and warm condo gym, armed with my IPOD shuffle. Surprisingly, after a week off my legs felt light and sharp, and in no less than two minutes in I began to gain my 7.5mph pace to something a little more challenging. I upped the step by .2mph every 5 minutes or so, until I was fifty minutes into my run and establish myself running at 9.0mph quite comfortably. Hmmmm.I thought to myself, is it so bad if I do my first run as a progression run? With Rihanna blasting in my ears `COMMON` COMMON` COMMON`` I didn`t make it lots of a moment thought. Suddenly Usher piped in (pardon the pun) and began to ask for `MORE!`,instructing me to `Clean IT UP, TAKE IT UP HIGHER, PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT GIVE IT MORE!` and as I am simply unable to say no to Usher, by 55minutes I had suddenly jumped up to 9.8mph (Usher has great powers). I held onto the rate for the next twenty minutes with the assistance of Ricky J, Tiao Cruz, Lady Gaga, more Show and of course Far East Movement, which place I figured I had better stop or I`d risk not being able to get out of bed the following day. My run felt stupendous - I most wished I had a speed that weekend so I could put my pent up energy to some productive use (and run with actual people) instead of wasting electricity in the gym (and working with my imaginary famous entourage).So my first run ended up being a number of 80 minutes and 12-ish miles, ending in a sub-19:00 5k. Not at all what I expected.The following day I decided to weather the outdoors (ok fine, I was yet a wimp but the gym closes from 8-9AM on weekends. Dammit! and do the beltline 10 mile loop - it was frigid (TWSS, obvi) but I dressed decently for once so it was bearable. My legs felt a little tired but I wasn`t sore, and I did the curl in a better time of low-74mins, which I found heavy to believe considering I was consciously trying not to go too fast. I am beginning to be confident that time off is a safe thing.yes, I am saying it out loud, even though it will arrive second to haunt me when coach forces further marathon tapers on me and sends me these very words to prompt me. Oh, the love-hate! I retreated to the treadmill again on Monday, where my planned easy run turned into another `tempo` of two 12 minute sections at 9 and 9.8mph, followed by 4min sections at 10-10.2mph. Yes, I definitely know how to form my way into training. That being said, it didn`t feel too strenuous, so perhaps I can give it off as some light tempo work before doing real intervals outside? Yes?The rest of the week I stayed outdoors, in true G.I. Jane form. I even did a circuit workout on Tuesday night with Jay and Jacquie (Ja triple threat), though we get finally arrive to our senses and get stopped doing them outdoors on the wet and/or frosty grass of Churchill park. There is something completely pointless about doing static strength exercises in the inhuman and getting soaking wet when you could actually be doing the precise same thing inside. Jay kindly invited us to his condo gym, where we went through Kap `N K`s torture plan in its entirety (almost), even doing jumps down the rug of what seemed to be an elegant ballroom. I'm sure that was appreciated.I can say my week as a 'normal person' has ended because upon entering Starbucks after a -18 degree run this morning, the employees changed their comments from `beautiful` to `OH MY GOD YOU Seem LIKE A RACCOON!` That`s a new one. We went from `hot and sweaty`, to `raccoon-like`.Seriously? I forced to recall if I had accidentally put makeup on at 5:30 in the forenoon before going out for my run, or possibly had slept-walked and put mascara all over my face. I was fairly sure that my case was untouched, so I asked them what made me reminiscent of such an animal. `Your case is brilliant red except for around your eyes! It looks so funny!` Well, they certainly aren`t discrete, but at least they`re honest? I am confident that they think I am some form of scientific specimen whose phenotype they must maintain and read on a casual basis: `The development of raccoon runner: 2010`. At least I appear to be providing them with a dynamic array of information and what seems to be a perpetual reservoir of entertainment!Back to the run - Thursday`s run was possibly the most rude awakening to winter. Now Wednesday was cold - I met Nic in Forest Hill and prided myself in being able to withstand -8 degree temperatures for 80 minutes and actually getting hot at the end. Of course, Thursday we ran longer and it was a frigid -18 with wind chill. Seriously, what month is it? Isn`t this supposed to occur in late January? My hands got frostbite for probably the 10th time now, and upon my return home I spent five minutes in the gym washroom shrieking while they oh-so-slowly and painfully thawed to room temperature (I inquire what the masses in the adjacent room were thinking?). Perhaps I should just move to Russia, as it would be good as insensate and I would give admittance to superfluous amounts of cheap vodka. And of class as the saying goes:"In America, you can ever get a party.In Soviet Russia, the company always finds you."I wish it. (Subject to your own interpretation, of course!)
No comments:
Post a Comment